The one thing that has cluttered my life more than anything else involves food. My lack of self-control and the resulting health frustrations have taken over my life on many occasions, costing time, money, and countless hours spent in places where only the sick should go.

Many of us turn to food when we’re angry, sad, lonely, bored, anxious, depressed, fearful, or a host of other emotions. We’ve never learned to control our feelings, especially in the midst of the more powerful ones we don’t understand.

If we call this kind of eating “emotional eating,” it will begin to make sense.

Eating gives us something to focus on besides the feelings. But then we choose foods that are bad for us — foods high in sugars and salt, low in quality proteins and fats. It is well known that the brain produces chemicals that make us high — the runner’s high for instance. Certain foods set off these chemicals too. They make you feel better even when your life is in a shambles.

Eating these types of foods, the ones that make us “high,” is addictive. This type of addiction is difficult to break, but it is possible. With alcohol or other drugs you can abstain completely. And you can stop everything related to them, including friends who do these things with you. But you can’t just stop eating.

Emotional eating usually includes an addiction to junk foods.

You can train yourself to make different choices about food. But these choices won’t happen when you’re trapped in a cycle of automatically reaching for addictive foods when you want to feel differently.

However, you can abstain from all junk foods. And many people have broken from this bondage by doing just that. If junk foods are not nearby, or if you’ve seriously chosen to deny yourself of all foods that are even slightly not perfect, you might just be successful. Many people have. Hermits, especially. But it’s hard to live a social life without being around junk foods, sweets, salty snacks, and other enticements.

Personally, I don’t believe the Creator of the universe, the One who made the bees that make honey and told us to eat it, means for us to live as hermits in a cave somewhere with no celebrations just because our particular culture has endorsed junk food. In fact, the Bible is full of celebrations we are commanded to observe.

So what is going on?

Instead of dealing with our feelings, we medicate with food to avoid them.

And instead of turning to God with our problems that cause these feelings, we turn to food.

That’s idolatry.

“Those who turn to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.” Jonah 2:8 NIV

A lot of people get grace and mercy confused. Here’s a short version of my favorite explanation:

You were driving too fast and are pulled over by the highway patrol. You were speeding, so you deserve a ticket. If you are given a warning, you just received mercy — you were forgiven and not punished for the crime you committed. However, if instead of a ticket, you were given $1000.00, then you’ve received grace.

Mercy is not receiving the punishment you deserved. Grace is getting a benefit you don’t deserve. We need both. (loosely taken from page 19 of Grace…The Power to Reign by Harold R. Eberle. http://www.worldcastministries.com/)

We attempt to control our feelings by eating. But once we start eating to control ourselves, we lose control of our eating.

We live a nightmare of food controlling us because we’ve given it power through the sin of idolatry.

We need mercy (not receiving the punishment we deserve) through forgiveness.

And we need grace (an undeserved blessing) to get out of this mess.

How do you stop?

The following is an abbreviated example of Terraforming (www.Terra4ming.com) used to help find the root of the problem and bring healing and freedom.

1) Ask the Lord to reveal the beginning of your eating problem.

I had several problems — I was a typical stick-skinny kid with multiple food allergies (undiagnosed) who was force-fed well beyond the point of pain because a lot of common foods made me nauseous. That was traumatic, and my response was anger, fear, bitterness, and attempts to escape the constant nagging to eat more.

The overeating began when my older sibling left home, which transferred the brunt of the family abuse onto me. At the same time my stomach issues got worse and I could no longer feel my stomach. I ate three to four times a normal amount of food at every meal and still didn’t feel like I had eaten. I was diagnosed with ulcers, but they did nothing back then to heal ulcers. They drugged me with Valium. I was in the tenth grade, had ulcers, was on three different drugs that altered the way I behaved, but nothing addressed my symptoms.

Since then I’ve noticed that in the beginning of a virus I tend to overeat because I can’t feel my stomach. Curious.

2) Forgive those parts of you that were left behind by the traumas.

First I forgave the young me that reacted in anger and bitterness when force fed and criticized for food behaviors. Then I moved on to forgive the teen-aged me who turned to food for comfort and couldn’t tell when she was full. And as I worked deeper into my past on a daily basis, I forgave a lot of abuse, neglect, abandonment, and betrayal that happened too.

3) Repent of the behavior.

The people who should have protected me were the ones I needed protection from. I repented of anger, hatred, denial, bitterness, judgment, fear, and wishing the deaths of those who tormented me. I also repented for the idolatry — turning to food for comfort instead of to God. And I repented for eating myself into frequent states of illness and disease, not to mention obesity.

4) Forgive those who trespassed against you.

I forgave my parents and siblings, and anyone looking on who didn’t see the truth and try to stop the abuse. And the doctors and nurses who made some bad decisions. And my grandparents who raised my mother to believe that forcing a child to eat is okay. And anyone else who contributed to or encouraged this sin against me. And I forgave my dad for allowing my mother to run everything in our family.

Then I prayed a sample prayer (Sample Prayer: Person) from www.Terra4ming.com on the “media” page. You can download the sample prayers and print them. It especially helped with taking authority over the situation.

5) Reset behaviors, get someone to help if needed.

I asked the Lord for guidance about future eating. I knew how to eat right, but I didn’t do it very often. It is sometimes best to stay away from entire groups of foods such as grains, sweets, dairy products, fast foods, or packaged snack foods for a set period of time and then test the water carefully to see if you’re ready to eat responsibly and without compulsion. Or sometimes it’s best to stop eating foods that are harmful for a longer period of time. There is a lot of information out there about “trigger foods” that may be helpful — the idea is that eating a specific class of foods (white flour products with cheese for instance) will set you off course into an eating binge. Explore why that happens — what memories come up when you think about macaroni and cheese?

Eating for health is quite a departure from living to eat.

It can take a few weeks to get used to it. I’d suggest making out a sample menu of healthy foods, with some back-ups in case you’re really hungry. But when you’re really hungry you’re probably burning fat.

It is also important to sit down to eat regular meals. If you graze all day, or eat while preparing foods, you’re not as aware and can frequently eat more than you want to. Put the food on the plate, determine if it’s the right balance of protein, fat, and carbohydrates and if the food quality is high. If it’s not, fix it before you begin eating. If you still feel hungry when you’re finished, stop and think a bit to see which food group you need more of or if you just underestimated your need for food at this meal.

Some people prefer their largest meal of the day for breakfast, others at mid-day. Most people who succeed at losing weight do NOT eat a large meal at the end of the day.

6) Don’t give in to fear, anger, cravings, or pity parties.

First I was afraid that I wouldn’t have enough food to eat. I had plenty of food in the house! Then I was afraid that I wouldn’t have the kind of foods I craved.

Cravings come in two forms — the good cravings that guide us into eating better, and the bad cravings that lead us to eat worse. More on Cravings.

I checked out the kitchen and decided that, too, was a lie. I had the right kind of foods ready to eat: apples on the table, carrots in the fridge, and plenty of other food. I was afraid of not being able to eat the foods I really liked. But I realized that when I was eating those foods they weren’t really that tasty. Then I was afraid that I would lose control and eat too much.

Be ready for the lies. Analyze them, find the truth, and stop believing the lies. Yes, you probably will go through a bit of detoxification. Yes, you’ll have more gas as your body cleans out. Yes, you’ll feel better. Yes, you’ll want to exercise more. Yes, the lies will continue for a while. Yes, you can argue with them. And sometimes those lies will give you insight into another part of you that needs to be dealt with. Start at #1 again to find the root and forgive, forgive, forgive.

7) Go and sin no more.

I had a dream many years ago. It was so graphic, so violent, and so demented that I remember it as if it had happened this morning. The message was clear: if we continue to turn to satan for comfort we’re giving him more power over us. He is our greatest enemy, the guy who wants to kill us! Why would we continue to do what he wants?

My prayer is that the God of all the universe would open your eyes so you would see what is really going on to keep you in bondage to food, or anything else.

Receive the Father’s love so you can break free and live the life He created you to live.